Worshipping in the Dark

     At a conference in Traverse City, Robert Kellerman (author of God's Healing for Life's Losses) gave three definitions of worship:

• Worship is wanting God more than we want relief.
• Worship is finding God even when we don't find answers
• Worship is walking with God in the dark and finding him to be the light of our souls.

    I’ll be honest: most of the time I go to God because I want to experience relief rather than because I want to experience God, irregardless of whether or not I gain respite from my temporary dilemmas.

     Most of the time I don’t feel like I’ve found God unless I have found answers, even though the book of Job reminds me that God can be thunderously near while remaining inexplicable and mysterious.
     Most of the time I don't feel like I've seen God unless I have seen my own life impacted, even though I am surrounded by so many people in whom the presence of God has been transformative.
     Most of the time, when walking in the dark, I expect God to bring daylight to the world around me rather than illumination within me.

    God, when you bring relief, and provide satisfying answers, and brighten the world, remind me to praise you as my only true Deliverer.

   When you allow my distress for a season, and you don’t answer my questions, and you don’t immediately push back the shadows, remind me to embrace you as my only true Hope.